Beautiful Suffering

Last year a good friend of mine was going though a really difficult struggle in her life. I sympathized with her heartache but simply didn't know how to comfort her other than pointing her back to Jesus- because he does a far better job being compassionate than I ever have or ever will. I do remember during my prayer time for her I asked the Lord to just give me a glimpse of her pain, her plight. I wanted to understand more fully because I cared for her enough to want to share in suffering with her just to be able to identify more with the nature of her heart.

That's the thing about Love- It's willing to suffer just to get closer to your heart. It's willing to want to go deeper in pain and suffer on behalf of relating to you. After all- that's what Jesus did, that's why he came. He came to suffer in hopes that we would see how his suffering related to our lives- that his sacrifice had everything to do with his Love and compassion but that's not the end of the story.
The suffering our savior encountered on that cross -ONCE AND FOR ALL- (Read that again) gave us power. His power, the same power that Raised Jesus from the dead now lives in us if we Trust Jesus with our lives.

 "I also pray that you will understand the incredible greatness of God’s power for us who believe him. This is the same mighty power that raised Christ from the dead and seated him in the place of honor at God’s right hand in the heavenly realms." Eph 1:19-20 

So if we have this power, how can we begin to understand how to use it... What to do with it? First the revelation of this power should not allow us to boast in ourselves rather in the giver of life. We must remember in his death and baptism we died with him, and in his resurrection we will rise with him in new life in his righteousness. ((Romans 6)) Now, no longer do our stains of sin seep though the surface because we have a robe of righteousness that covers and that robe is the Suffering of Christ. 

So then, since Christ suffered physical pain, you must arm yourselves with the same attitude he had, and be ready to suffer, too. For if you have suffered physically for Christ, you have finished with sin. 1peter 4:1 

So it turns out not only do we have power over death, we have power over sin! The Lord has been gently reminding me of this fact lately. I know my life has been splattered with sin's signature stink and I continue to need an abundance of Grace which Jesus is so gracious to present to me, but it doesn't end there. His signature is one of grace and love beyond all compare - it cannot be revoked if our hearts are postured toward the son.

We are victorious over sin. That doesn't mean we won't ever sin rather it's our posture. We can claim victory over sin that has dragged us down into the pits more than once. The sins we hide and push away-- ashamed that an evil can exist as such in our hearts- so we "run" from God and "hide" our failings.

He gives us a way out, a way for sinners- A victory over those secret things- Over the failures that we can hardly verbalize. He has given us this because he loves us. He suffered so that we would have VICTORY over such things.

 "Overwhelming victory is ours through Christ, who loved us." Romans 8:37 

This past week I was reminded about these secret things by our very own Moto driver here. He had been acting off lately so I pulled him over and asked (In broken Creole mind you) if he would share with me what was bothering him. He went on this whole long explanation about how everyone has secrets and that he simply could not share with me. I reminded him that even if he could not share those secret things with me he can share those things with Jesus because he already knows what's going on in his heart. I was praying he could understand how the victory of Jesus was meant to give us victory as well though the burden being poured out onto Jesus-- It's great news!

I've recently been faced with an Idol that I had NO idea that existed in my heart. I was so burdened that in the face of this sin I took it to the father and he called me to fast.... Only I failed. I heard the Lord say I was to fast and seek his face and starve the Idol in my heart but I turned again from his precious face and into the arms of the Idol I fed. Such heartache I encountered. I am grateful that he picks us up from our heartache and turns us to the father who says look to my son.

 "For my Father's will is that everyone who looks to the Son and believes in him shall have eternal life, and I will raise them up at the last day." John 6:40 

That heartache was such as when I was suffering not long ago as a response to my prayer nearly a year earlier to experience some of my friends suffering. I realized amidst the trial that this struggle was to open my eyes and give me compassion not just for my friend but also for a sliver of the suffering encountered on the cross. It certainly doesn't compare, but remembering his suffering for my freedom and victory gave me hope that this desert would become an opportunity to share in Christ's death and resurrection. It's a strange thing to feel so convicted, lost, deserted then remember with great grace- this must have been the tip of the iceberg of what Christ felt for us all that day he was lead to Calvary. <He must increase I must decrease> As for my Idol, the battle isn't over I am afraid I will fight that until the day I meet the one who suffered on our behalf but I do have great confidence in his blood's power in my life as I claim victory over sin. All sin, "small sin" ugly sin, hidden sin, blatant sin, comforting sin, sins of omission, sins of commission, sins of old, any and all sin. I remember that sin does not have the final word. He already spoke those words....

                                 "It is FINISHED" John 19:29-30

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One year

One year ago today 4/2/2012

365 days.

Has it really been a year?

This day last year I felt a HUGE urgency to fast and pray for God’s will.

He made himself clear. So clear, he wanted my heart to become broken for Haiti. He began that day one year ago and his faithfulness amazes me. He is amazing! He keeps pushing my heart in the direction of his will for my life! Praise God!

The following is from my journal on this day last year:

“Lord, I need scripture about your provision, plan, and will. Also, scripture about your desire for me to serve the least of these, as well as scripture about your truth and sharing that truth and how you will protect me doing that if you so will. I trust you!”

Then he revealed to me these scriptures that I hold close to my heart;

Isaiah 6:8                         Then I heard the voice of the Lord, saying, "Whom shall I send, and who will go for Us?" Then I said, "Here am I. Send me!"

Psalm 121:1-4                 I lift up my eyes to the mountains—

                                     where does my help come from?

My help comes from the Lord,

the Maker of heaven and earth.

 

Isaiah 50:4-5                    The Sovereign LORD has given me his words of wisdom, so that I know what to say to all these weary ones. Morning by morning he wakens me and opens my understanding to his will. The Sovereign LORD has spoken to me, and I have listened. I do not rebel or turn away.

Isaiah 54:10                      He said to me, "You are my servant, Israel, and you will bring me glory."  I replied, "But my work all seems so useless! I have spent my strength for nothing and to no purpose at all. Yet I leave it all in the LORD's hand; I will trust God for my reward."

The praise of prayer followed by tears of joy one year ago;

            “Oh Lord, you heard my prayer and showed me with your word a great reassurance, security, you’re will, faithfulness, guidance, and your hand that was in all that is my heart for Haiti. I pray that I continue to take these concerns to you and seek for truth in your word so that I can hear you clearly and be guided by your will not my own. Thank you Lord for your great plan for my life and showing me that you alone are good and you alone are God. Praise be to your name!”

            I write this to show how good and faithful our God is. A year ago he stirred in my heart what was to be my future, and I trusted him, even though it was not easy. Before I encountered God that day I remember writing down all my fears on a piece of paper, in black marker. Bold and ugly. Fear is UGLY. Then as he faithfully showed me his truth through the word and I began ripping that paper (all my fears) up! Fear no longer had any power, because I recognized his immense love! 2 Timothy 1:7 states “For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control.” I saw it clearly, his love that washed away all my fears and that lead me in self-control to see his will above my own.

            I’m humbled today to be sitting in that same great, vast, extraordinary love of the Lord that is stirring my heart to return again to Haiti now with a deeper understanding of his will. I need your help though, I must raise 3,500 in a very short time, but I trust that God’s timing is perfect. Would you prayerfully consider supporting sending me back to Haiti to therefore see the Lords will be done? I appreciate all your prayers as I am being constantly prepared by the Lord, and trusting that He will provide for my needs in the way he wills. If you feel the holy spirit leading you to trust God’s movement about what I will be doing in Haiti come august read more about it here:HERE!! :) I am overjoyed to be sitting in this day a year later reflecting on God’s goodness. I pray you are lead to do the same though reading this post. Glory be to God!