Childlike

 

 

A Child's heart is to be captured, embraced, loved.

And he said: “Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven."

As a 23 year old I often feel the imbalance between childhood and the brink of adulthood. It's a struggle to remain in the framework of child-like faith yet facing the sobering realities of life. I can hardly imagine how some children I encounter in Haiti face this hard truth everyday- that their childhood reality is ripped away. Children as young as 5 doing all the household chores... cooking, cleaning just to "earn their way." In Bondage, taken hostage their childlike tendencies and demanding a new framework out of necessity. They grow up in an instant, lacking time to giggle, run, dance, and the freedom to be a child.

I look into longing eyes every day. I see hunger and pain. I watch children carry other younger children up a mountain to receive their only meal in God-knows how long. I witness countless children longing for affection running up to me for a simple hug. Many fight over being held and played with because they so desperately desire attention. Much of the behavior issues I deal with result from a child acting out because that's the only way they know how to seek attention. They are so thirsty, not only for water but for their hearts to be filled the way a child's should be.  

"Let anyone who is thirsty come to me and drink, whoever believes in me, as Scripture has said, rivers of living water will flow from within them." John 7:37-38

So many adults don't want to see this. They don't want to see those who hurt because it brings up hurts of their own. As an adult there must be something those eyes have to do, they must see responsibility and weight with every glance in a third world- or in a first world for that matter. Yet I think the weight is a Godly weight. If we shielded our eyes from those who hurt, we wouldn't see as a child does.

I was sitting talking to Blondine, a sweet teenage neighbor who I spent a good deal of time with last summer. She was telling me how she sees the injustice of her country and God's goodness in the same breath. How can that be? An adult mind would have to rationalize two conflicting realities, yet she observes plainly: the broken world in which the Kingdom has yet come, and the Goodness of God in the fact that the Kingdom of God has already come.

"I am the Alpha and the Omega--the beginning and the end," says the Lord God. "I am the one who is, who always was, and who is still to come--the Almighty One." Rev. 1:8

Sure, it's easier to be blinded. It's easier to seek comfort. It's easier to plan your own life, than to let go and offer up your life plans to the maker of life. The boldness it takes to abandon your own plans in place of something radically different takes childlike faith. I often feel as if the world constantly struggles to place the blindfold back on my eyes, taking bits of the childlike out of my perspective. Sometimes with comfort in reach, even simple things like ice and electricity I feel I am slowly becoming blind. It's as if all the discomfort was actually allowing me to see after all- to shed that layer that blinds and restrains. Are we really giving up the awe and wonder of child-like eyes for ease and comfort? It's a shame when we can't see though the fog of our own pacifying flesh continuing to whisper... you don't want to see... seeing is a challenge, better just sit in the dark. 

Slowly, however I do see.
The Lord gives me glimpses.
Just a half second glance into the eyes of Christ and we would all be hooked.
I see in a way I believe Christ sees.
That's my prayer each and every day... to see with his eyes.
I'm pretty sure Christ has childlike eyes.
He sees wonder in a glance, and awe is a normal skeptical at his creation.
He doesn't see the lack before him, rather the fullness of child likeness.

Look with childlike eyes, see Christ who will be exalted among the nations.
Look with childlike eyes, see a generation willing to say yes to difficulty for the kingdom.
Look with childlike eyes, see peace to capture universal hearts, starting with you.
Look with childlike eyes, see freedom in Christ as a blessing beyond all measures.

Take back the rationality
Take back the pride
Take back the criticism

Replace with Faith
Replace with rejoicing
Replace with thanksgiving

 

and...

 

"come in the fullness of the blessing of the gospel of Christ." (Romans15:29)

to the very throne of Grace.

 

 

Magnified Gratitude

Have you ever walked into an experience totally oblivious to how God might reveal something to you? It happens to me pretty frequently, mostly because I am too focused on my own thoughts in order to see what God is prompting. He softly says, “Look child I have a sight for you, not seen by your eyes but your heart.” (2 Cor 5:7) I wiped tears in the small cemented room God so sovereignty placed me in for less than 5 minutes yesterday.

I had heard God’s stirring in my heart to start a Respire Haiti Photo blog I began praying about who God wanted me to photograph first, he continued to place Fifi- our incredible housekeeper on my heart. I had watched how she praises the lord for all things big and small. As I talked over photographing Fifi with Megan she expanded on her sweet thankful spirit explaining that every pay-day when she receives her money she immediately raises her hands and repeats “merci jezi” (Thank you Jesus) over and over. So many instances I have found Fifi praising the Lord, doing laundry, dishes, cleaning I wouldn't even be surprised if she was worshiping our God even when she was in the bathroom. Oh how her spirit radiates pure thanksgiving to our Lord.

For nearly a week I had told Fifi I wanted to come home with her to photograph her there, she would joyfully respond “pa gen pwoblem”. I finally got my opportunity yesterday around 5:30 it had just finished raining and I saw she was carrying quite a load so I helped carry some of her items home.

As I scan though the photos I took, one stood out. She had just opened her door – freshly painted light blue and the joy on her face just radiates. As she walked into the house she did something I was familiar with her doing- lifting her hands in praise and thanking the Lord. I had walked home with Fifi once last summer to help her carry some things and I remembered how the Lord made me take a breath after I realized what she was doing. She was praising the Lord for her four walls, no matter their condition just pure praise. Sure by our standards it may look like she didn't have anything to praise over because she had no electricity, no running water (she took her daily supply from our house) a small bed that felt more like wood two by fours stacked together, yet she was thankful. My heart took a step back that moment last year and again in that moment yesterday to catch my breath for such beautiful thankfulness.

She offered me the only chair she had in her home to sit on as per cultural norm I sat and thanked her. Suddenly I realized I wasn't actually here to photograph her, God had something bigger for my heart to learn.  I snapped a few photos but wasn't actually concentrated because I was overwhelmed by how much my heart was seeing. Fifi was settling a few things on her bedside table as the tears welled up into my eyes, I had been so concentrated for the last month on all that I did not have (comforts of home, simple foods like cheese, the ability to just call a friend) that I didn't see the tremendous blessings he had before me. I was missing it altogether and in that moment in her house I realized my foolishness and was so thankful for God’s grace. I wiped my tears fast out of fear that she may see my tears and due to the language barrier didn't want her to think I was crying over her circumstance. She had abundantly more than enough maybe not by the world’s standards but certainly in Christ. She then informed me that she was going to a prayer meeting at the church and invited me. I respectably declined as I need to get home because it was getting late.

 My heart was so filled upon leaving her home that I took my sweet time walking home reflecting on the gracious heart that I had just encountered and prayed my heart would in turn become transformed by Christ in the manner God molded Fifi’s.  The sun was setting and I was thankful for the stillness of the town after a rain, for the cool breeze regardless the temperature, for the simple sweet glances from children as I passed, for the meal I was arriving home to. In that moment my heart was beginning to shed the thoughts of my flesh and taking new shape in gratitude and thanksgiving for all things that lie before me, I just needed to take the time to see with my heart as the Lord prompted into eternity.Magnified gratitude. Magnified thanksgiving. Magnified Christ in all circumstances. He holds all things together; I remember and breathe in a new understanding of peace.

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